!ADVERSE ADS
Sometimes just as memorable as the comics themselves, are the advertisements within. From the incalculable uses of Hostess snack cakes in crimefighting, to bizarre T-Shirts and snug tidy whities, you could find it in the comics. This page is devoted to some of the stranger adverts you might find flipping through some of your favorite issues.
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From Doom Patrol #96 in 1965 (and many, many other comics of that era) comes a time capsule from the world of pre-safety standards approved child playthings. Not too long ago another company released magnet sets as well, and these were recalled because children being children they’d swallow them – and the magnets would get stuck together in the child’s stomach and intestines – and folks, that’s not a good thing.
But this ad is a child of the 1960s and who cares if something could potentially kill your kid? It’s all worth it if you can get them to look just as f****d up as the kid above. Seriously, that’s one of the lamest “magic tricks” the world has ever seen and the kid is completely awed. Either the kid is high – or he’s got a belly full of magnets and his pal is showing him what his gut is doing right now.

Yeah, you’re screwed Billy.
Want to check out more Adverse Ads? Just scroll down and click on the links!
ADVERSE ADS ARCHIVES (in no particular order, click on
the yellow text below to see the entry)
Ever
wondered where grade school teachers get their egg hatching equipment? Wonder
no more!
See the world’s smallest tool and
the only glove that can hold it!
Captain
Marvel Meets the Twinkie Master!
The most
frustrating Godzilla Christmas Ornament ever!
This Naruto toy really is a gas!!!
Duke
the Dog is not just into action, but SUPER ACTION!!!
Two ads for the price of one! TV hypnosis and Muscles? the
Charles Atlas way!
This
Duraclean campaign leads with their best side!
Teach your kids how to drive with
the wonderful Classy Car Crashers!
Nothing
says sexy like wearing those swim-proof lips!
Betty (of Archie fame)
shills Psychodelic stuff.
I love my
HULK belt! It says HULK, has a HULK card
and…that’s about it.
Green Arrow
unveils the dreaded FRUIT PIE ARROW!!!
How to write crappy paragraphs and make
money? Count me in!!!
Having trouble with the ladies? Try the HYPNOTIC CURE ALL!!!
Order
Superman’s death for $2.50 (plus $1 postage) with Kryptonit rocks!!!
Authentic
BANANA GEAR helps you SAVE THE WHOLE DAMN UNIVERSE!!!
Tired of
your dead end job? Then pick up a comic
and enter the field of LAW ENFORCEMENT!!!
Finally become the envy of all
peeping Toms by getting the Spy All!!
My Hair! My Beautiful Hair!!! Curse you lousy, stinking bacteria!!!!
Ever
wonder how you’d look with 32 different hairstyles? Me neither.
Don’t know how to tell her
how you feel? Say it with Zolatron!
Saturday Mornings
will never be the same after this ad!!
Meet
the Chia Pets that NASA Endorses!!
GI
Joe meets the Six Million Dollar Atomic Knock Off!!
Crush your enemies
with your own 7 Foot Tall Robot!!
Cure Nail Biting and get Married!!
Mow them down with your very own Bike
Machine Gun!
Hey Guys! Ready
for your own hands of steel?
The Mummy Lives! – for Spirograph?
Ever dreamed
of building your own hovercraft? Yeah,
me neither.
Click
here and become one with advertising goals!
Need some high performance head?
Click here!
Crispy critters delivered right to your
door! Only $2.98!!!
Sally learns to play with Tommy’s
Tricky Willie!?!
Spidey’s
Aunt May has been kidnapped… for Twinkies!?!
T-Shirts, get your bizarre
Crumbly T-Shirts here!!!
Tired of that incessant stickiness?
Try some lube for that cube!
Anyone for some monkey flavored
Capri-Sun?
And for the men, meet the New New Commander!!!
Thin
wasn’t always in! Wate-on sister, Wate-on!!!
Tommy and Sally learn the joys of Nuclear Submarine
War!!!
And what’s a Nuclear Sub without a
Computer Brain!!!
And the most dreaded of weapons –
THE ACCORDIAN!!!
The Moon Blob is coming! – Run! Run for your lives!!!


“Remember kids, no matter how much life gets you down,
just keep on dancing! Hooray!” – Mr. Zodiac